Several months ago I booked a weekend away from home. I was desperate for tranquility, peace, and zero distractions. In the meantime, I attended Speak Up Conference 2023 in Grand Rapids. God seemed to be telling me that I hadn’t been trusting Him. So I found myself looking forward with great anticipation to my scheduled weekend away.
I’ve been journaling, writing on group Facebook pages, speaking, and I’ve even done some ghost writing for a newspaper. But I was so caught up by fear of failure that I hadn’t pursued anything further. It appeared pretty apparent that I had work to do.
My bag was packed: clothes and shoes for hiking, a brand new spiral notebook (I’m still old-school and find the pen and paper therapeutic), two new books, a word search, and my Bibles. I was set; excited and nervous at the same time.
As I drove up the long lane, I instantly felt calm. Peace covered everything I was seeing, hearing, and breathing. The hosts welcomed me at the door and gave me the tour which ultimately ended at my room. A single room with four beds! More than enough space to spread out and move around. The bathroom contained another confirmation: my life verse was etched on a picture on the vanity.
It didn’t take long to settle in. I grabbed my books and pens and paper and headed outside under the never-ending canopy
of trees. I pondered. I read. I wrote. I prayed. I watched. I listened. I cried.But I kept coming up empty. Nothing new. Nothing surprising. Just nothing. Don’t get me wrong. It was certainly not wasted. But I had honestly believed God had something to tell me. So I put on hiking shoes and hit the trails. Although the scenery was perfection……still nothing. This cycle repeated itself for 24 hours.
It was past my normal time to eat supper so I decided to head that direction. Breakfast was provided, but I was on my own for lunch and supper. I made it to the fridge just in time to see another guest scooping my meal onto a plate. He seemed genuinely caught off guard and said, “Where did you come from? I thought everyone else left. I hope I’m not eating your fettuccine”. I didn’t have the heart to tell him the truth; he seemed lost and maybe even sad. I replied, “No. Not at all. I’m just grabbing my bag of grapes”. I chuckled to myself instead of being upset and decided God WAS in fact trying to remind me of Deuteronomy 8:3 that says, “man does not live by bread alone but by every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord”.
There was an area on one of the trails that was set up to resemble a chapel. Visiting there seemed to be a logical next step. I grabbed one of my Bibles and set off.
I felt drawn to my verse in Proverbs. The opposite of fear can be trust. So I’m going to look at that section of chapter three.
Verse one begins with, “do not forget my teaching” and “keep my commandments”. Verse three is “bind love and faithfulness around your neck and write them on your heart”. Verse five says, “trust in the Lord and NOT your own understanding”. Verse six tells me, “acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight”. It was all right there all along. In the middle of the vast expanse of the woods with no one else; only God. That’s the whole point. I don’t need to worry about what to write or speak about. If I’m keeping Him at the center of my focus, I’ll know what to write and what to say. It will be about Him and for Him. Not me.
I continued to find further affirmation of walking the right path. The two books I took to read; well those were no coincidence. They both ended using I Peter 5:10. The same verse I personally referenced two weeks ago at Grace Wesleyan. And the first scene in the second book opened with a story on September 9; the same day I started reading it. Okay, God. I hear you. Loud and clear.
I may not know what I’m going to write in my book. But I firmly believe I can trust the One who does know