There’s a story in the Bible (I Samuel 18-20 and Psalm 11 & 59) about friendship. It’s really rather incredible. David and Jonathan would’ve been unlikely friends by most standards (Jonathan was the son of King Saul and David was chosen by God to be the next king ~ for the culture at that time, that didn’t make any sense). Yet their story demonstrates over and over the bond that they shared.
I’ve had many sweet friendships deposited into my life over the years. From kindergarten to high school and all the years after, God has outdone Himself. I was somewhat hesitant initially to single one out. I didn’t want anyone to feel excluded. But God seemed to be telling me that our story needed to be told. So here I am; looking for the right words to tell you about my “creepy” friend.
I’m sure you didn’t expect that previous sentence. Creepy? That’s how I’m going to start telling you about her? Yes! That’s the word we always used for each other. Nothing else seemed to fit.
April and I met sometime around 2009-2010 at Shelbyville Community Church. We were on the worship team together in addition to a few Bible studies. It didn’t take long for us to click. We were generally the two wild cards in any setting. We shared lots of similar likes and dislikes. We finished each other’s sentences. We were simply meant by God to be friends. Sisters even.
In January 2011 I was diagnosed with melanoma. I was in a terrible place in my life. Attempts to reconcile my marriage (that ended in 2002) had fallen into a million pieces. Despite everything I had endured, I found myself not fully confiding in anyone. There was no easy way to explain to anyone what I was experiencing. So I just continued to walk alone. Now, being told I had cancer, I had to allow friends to actually come alongside me and help. It was one of the most difficult times I’ve ever known.
I went to Simon Cancer Center for my surgery. Several of my friends from SCC were there. They were amazing. But my creepy friend was who I really needed. She was the best “take home nurse” ever. I have a picture of her sitting beside me, just rubbing my back, as I leaned over trying not to puke. (That was after we had applied temporary tattoos, I think.) But even more than her “nursing” skills, I needed to open my soul to her. I
needed to tell her that I was in an emotional relationship that I shouldn’t be in. I needed her to help me. I desperately wanted to confess my wrongdoing. But I didn’t. Every time I got close, fear stepped in. The enemy convinced me that she wouldn’t still be my friend. He convinced me that she wouldn’t understand. And I listened. And I kept my secret. Until that day.
It was a terrible day. And not only did April know, but so did everyone else. There was a lot of crying. I think I remember some yelling. It was excruciating. I had screwed up so many things! And all because I listened to Satan, I was losing my friend, too. What in the world had I done?
The next several months passed with some sporadic calls, texts, or quick visits as we attempted to work through this sin that had severed us. But it wasn’t working. Honestly, I still had a lot of junk to sort out and navigate. Until I did an authentic overhaul of my life, nothing else was going to matter. April had a heart that I had betrayed. Only she can tell her part of the story. She never completely cut me out. But she set healthy boundaries to protect herself as she moved forward.
As the years passed, we found ourselves at places like Women of Faith where we would run into each other. And then, in God’s divine plan, He brought her to work at MHP. Over the course of several years, we began taking the steps to repair and restore what I had allowed the enemy to steal. Many long conversations. Some of them to specifically address what needed to be sorted out. And some of them were simply spent catching up on the life events we missed together. One of the best memories I have is April at my 50th birthday party (the day after I finished chemo/radiation for my second round of cancer). SHE WAS THERE. Period.
I’m not sure that we will every fully be restored to the creepy level we were before. (Although that’s most certainly my hope and prayer.) But these things I do know: 1) Satan is a thief and a liar and I won’t allow him to trick me again 2) Godly friendship is priceless ~ she would’ve still loved me while holding me accountable 3) I love her and her heart so much! And I’m grateful to God for her every day. Find an April. We all need one (or two).
Sincere, heartfelt story with a lesson for all of us!
Thank you, Gina. My prayer is that by being vulnerable it will encourage others to step out of the darkness where Satan tries to hold us prisoner. Freedom is an incredible thing.
I can absolutely relate to this in many ways. I have an April and I’m not sure what I would do without her. Thank you for sharing. ❣️